Time for your hump day dose of definitive dyslexia, with a boozy entry in the alternative dictionary;
“Intelligent” – That one bloke in the pub who always wants the TV on.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
Every now and again, a name strikes me as requiring a new, badly spelled definition. Today’s entry in the alternative dictionary is one of those occasions, and a literary one at that;
“Pasternak” – Dr Zhivago’s ability to eat spaghetti.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
A little late on parade for one liner Wednesday today, but now I’m here I may as well provide you with your weekly dose of redefinition with the alternative dictionary. This one is well, self-explanatory, if misspelled;
“Addicted” – (Cruz or Bundy, for example)
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
More midweek linguistic mischief for you today, in the shape of one liner Wednesday’s regular entry in the alternative dictionary;
“Canonize” – A photographer’s squint.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
Wednesday means word day and today’s re-imagined interpretation in the alternative dictionary is another misspelled missive on modern life;
“Feasting” – That pesky hidden charge they hit you with, just when you think you have a bargain.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
For today’s exercise in phonetic pedantry, our entry in the alternative dictionary stops just short of obscenity;
“Focussing” – The kind of restrained not-really-swearing employed in polite company (drat, dagnabbit, darn, fiddlesticks, etc)
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
Today’s alternative definition is etymological and entomological in equal measure;
“Covenants” – A society of insectile witches.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
This week’s fatuously phonetical entry in the alternative dictionary deals with our fun-loving feathered friends;
“Political” – The best way to make a parrot laugh.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
Although today’s alternative definition sounds like it could refer to this unlikely fashion trend, I have chosen to go for the one I thought of first;
“Bumbling” – Jewellery for tramps.
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One liner Wednesday: Alternative dictionary.
Today’s alternative definition is my favourite kind. In other words, it’s a really terrible, incredibly contrived pun, which has no bearing whatsoever on the word being defined;
“Photosynthesis” – The manufacture of prosthetic podiatric digits.
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