Every now and then an alternative definition pops into my head when I read a word, then refuses to leave, no matter how corny and terrible it is. This leaves no room for additional thoughts to percolate, until I have excised it by inflicting it on you, my long-suffering readers.

This is an example of one such mindworm, so I apologise in advance for its awfulness:

“Operating” – Jamaican term for a highbrow musical form (e.g. Aida, Don Giovanni, etc)

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For this Wednesday’s one line redefinition in the alternative dictionary we have something that won’t be popular over Christmas:

“Rationale” – Limit the amount of beer available.

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Today’s misheard and misspelled alternative definition is the result of Audrey discovering a new word during a conversation about impolite political rhetoric;

“Diatribe” – “Is that what vegans are in?”

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Today’s alternative definition has a distinctly male slant to it;

“Baltic” – An involuntary protective flinch, prompted by the threat of groin injury from any number of sources. (leaping pets, small children’s heads, sports, etc)

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A new sporting term is defined for this week’s entry in the alternative dictionary;

“Foreboding” – The nasty feeling that you might have just hit someone with a golf ball.

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Today’s word from the alternative dictionary is a redefined sporting term;

“Hindsight” – Targeting device used in deer hunting.

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Today’s redefined word in the alternative dictionary is nice and simple;

“Wellbeing” – e.g. The girl from The Ring.

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Good morning and welcome to this week’s poetically terminal entry in the alternative dictionary;

“Diverse” – An obituary.

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